|Guest Stars:||Katelyn Pippy as Jolie|
|Originally Aired:||February 10, 2006|
French 101 is the 2nd episode of the second season of The Suite Life of Zack & Cody. The episode starts when both Zack and Cody want a date with Jolie, the French Ambassador's daughter, who stays at the Tipton. Meanwhile, London beats a thief who Esteban couldn't, so Maddie wants to cheer him up.
The episode begins with Mr. Moseby welcoming the French Ambassador and his daughter, Jolie, to the Tipton. Mr. Moseby tells the Ambassador that his suite would make it feel like he is in France, but the Ambassador complains that he is still in America, making Moseby feel awkward and walk away. Zack and Cody walk in from what seems to be playing basketball, and Zack notices the Ambassador's daughter. He then walks over and begins flirting. The confused girl replies in French, and Mr. Moseby tells them "she's off limits." The girl then leaves with her father and Cody says Zack won't be able to get her. Zack grabs a french pastry from a nearby desert cart, and with a frosting stache looks at a giggling Jolie. He tells Cody who explains why she is smiling to an embarrassed Zack.
Maddie enters the The Tipton Hotel carrying several shopping bags to which Esteban remarks that London was shopping again. Maddie says London bought everything but the building. Suddenly, London is heard screaming so Esteban and Maddie rush outside. There they see a robber trying to take her purse. Esteban then tries to save her, but he is quickly defeated by the robber. The handle of the purse suddenly snaps, enraging London who defeats the robber with a martial arts move. Two cops then arrest the robber, and one comments how London saved Esteban. Maddie says that she thought Esteban was brave, but it clearly does not help.
The next morning Zack is trying to take a shower but is clearly lost, not knowing where the conditioner, shampoo etc are. He explains that he is trying to get a date with Jolie. After Zack leaves, Cody complains to Carey that Zack gets all the girls, to which Carey replies he has a fair chance, too. After Carey leaves, Cody tricks Zack by locking him in the closet and leaves to find Jolie.
In the Lobby, Arwin comes in to gossip to some of the staff that he heard Esteban was beat up by a girl, not knowing that Esteban is right there with the staff members. Esteban then says that the robber got a lucky shot, and asks London to flip him, to which she says no. He then grabs her shoulder to stop her from leaving, and she flips him.
Cody asks Mr. Moseby to be a translator to which he denies. However, Cody convinces him by asking if he would rather translate for Zack instead. With Mr. Moseby, Cody successfully asks Jolie on a date. Zack then comes downstairs and tries to convince Jolie otherwise--without Moseby's help--in English and with hand gestures, but Jolie does not understand him and replies in French that she is "scared". The Ambassador insists that Cody and Jolie have a chaperone and convinces Moseby to be their chaperone after threatening to check out of the Tipton.
Zack sulks as Cody prepares for his date while waiting for Moseby, who shows up less than enthusiastically with a bouquet of flowers for Cody to give Jolie. After Cody and Mr Moseby leave, Zack complains to Carey that it is "unfair" and devises a plan to get back at Cody for locking him in the closet and for "stealing" Jolie away from him. Zack convinces Bob that Cody is mean, exaggerating that Cody locked him up in the closet with a bag of snakes Cody, Jolie and Mr Moseby arrive at a club, with Mr Moseby obviously feeling uncomfortable as he repeatedly tries to make Cody and Jolie leave. However, he is unwillingly dragged into the middle of the crowd as Cody needs him as a translator. Bob distracts Cody by asking him a chemistry question while Zack gets Moseby out of the way by putting an ice cube down his shirt. Zack flirts with Jolie using some pre-written French lines on colored cards. When Cody finds out, he demands that Zack give him the cards in anger, to which Zack gives him some and tells him they are French insults. Thinking Zack is lying to him and believing that the lines were actually compliments, Cody uses the lines on Jolie which hurts her feelings--they were actually insults--and she storms off. Zack hurries after Jolie and attempts to comfort her, but this angers Cody and he chases after Zack, prompting Moseby to chase after them.
At the same time, London and Maddie devise a plan to gain Esteban's confidence back by faking another robbery, with Arwin being the "robber". The plan seems to be going well, with Esteban outside fighting the "robber" and Maddie, London and Carey watching from inside, until they realize that the real Arwin is standing inside with them watching the fight, and that Esteban is fighting an actual robber. They rush outside yelling at Esteban to let go of the robber, which he does, causing the robber falls over, and Esteban places his foot on top of his chest and declares that he has won.
Back at home, Carey lectures the boys on their bad behavior. Carey and Cody are upset that Zack sabotaged Cody and hurt Jolie's feelings as well. Zack tries to argue that he was technically telling the truth about the insults. After Carey leaves, Cody begins to fake cry so to guilt Zack into getting Jolie back for him. Zack goes down and apologizes to Jolie, gaining him a kiss. Ironically, Cody came down just in time to witness the kiss and chases Zack around the lobby in fury. Bob then asks Moseby if Jolie is available, but Moseby says to ask her himself. Bob, ironically, speaks fluent French and does just that.
- [Cody chases after Zack in the lobby]
- Bob: (gesturing to Cody and Zack) Where are they going?
- Mr. Moseby: With any luck, the Bermuda Triangle.
- Esteban: (after defeating the purse snatcher) No one assaults a woman by Esteban Julio Ricardo Montoya de la Rosa Ramírez! Or, as I will now be called... El Diablo!
- Zack: (to Jolie) You, me. Dinner, dancing.
- Jolie: J'ai peur. (Translation: I'm scared.)
- Zack: She wants me.
- Mr. Moseby: Yes, arrested.
- Zack (to Jolie) Hey, beautiful. I don't always smell like this, unless you like it.
- Jolie: Je ne comprends pas. Je suis désolé. (Translation: I do not understand. I am sorry.)
- Zack: What a beautiful name. Désolé.
- Mr. Moseby: That means "sorry." Her name is Jolie, and like the dessert cart, she's off limits.
- Cody : Well, how do I look? And be brutal.
- Zack: Like a backstabbing, French girl-stealing jerk in a goofy sweater vest.
- Cody: You really think it looks goofy?
- Cody: You look fabulous.
- Jolie: Uh, Pardon?
- Cody: (motions for Moseby) I need you to translate. Say, "your eyes are beautiful".
- Moseby: What?
- Cody: Tell her, "your eyes are beautiful"!
- Moseby: What?!
- Cody: (grabs Moseby's shirt) YOUR EYES ARE BEAUTIFUL! (everyone stops and looks at them)
- Moseby: (hesitantly) Thank you. I like your sweater.
- Cody: Sorry about that. Hey did I ever tell you... Vos cheveux ressemblent à l'algue? (Translation: Your hair looks like seaweed.)
- Jolie: Excusez moi?
- Cody: Vous êtes comme idiot comme poteau. (Translation: You're dumber than a post.)
- Jolie: Je suis quoi?!
- Cody: Vous sentez comme une chèvre humide. (Translation: You smell like a wet goat.)
- Mr. Moseby: How is everything going?
- Jolie: (stomps on Cody's foot)
- Cody: Je suis ow!
- Zack: (while on the phone) Hey Bob, you busy tonight? Wanna come to the club with me? No, not as my date!
- Jolie: (to Cody while trying to speak English) See you...yesterday! (she walks off)
- Cody: Yesterday. She meant tomorrow. Isn't that the cutest thing?
- Zack: Why do you always fall for Cody's sweet and sensitive act?
- Carey: That's not an act, That's how he is.
- Zack: But he locked me in a closet! He's vicious I tell you, vicious!
- Carey: Are we talking about the same kid who cries when I vacuum up the dust bunnies?
- Zack: Oh, he's good!
- Cody: (to Bob) For the last time, that's the difference between boron and freon! Now I'd like to be free from you, boron!
- Bob: I can't believe you he locked you in a closet! With a bag of snakes! ...You know, that just doesn't sound like him.
- Zack: It's all an act! He's vicious I tell ya! Vicious! Now distract Cody while I get rid of Mr. Moseby.
- Bob: Okay, but next time, you're taking me to a movie!
- Zack: It's not a date!
- Jolie: (to Zack) Zat is so... spicy!
- Mr. Moseby: Oh, you mean sweet.
- Jolie: No. Spicy. (kisses Zack)
- Cody: (after seeing Jolie kiss Zack) This how you get a girl back for me?!
- Zack: It's not what it looks like!
- Cody: Well I'm gonna kick your a—
- Mr. Moseby: Derrière.
- Cody: That too!
- It is revealed that Bob can speak fluent French.
- Jolie means "pretty" or "beautiful" in French.
- The entire cast in this episode dance off in a disco-esque sequence.